I have always asked myself

I have always asked myself

“Will my children suffer because they have a working mother? Will they be deprived?”

No matter the situation, the answer is: That depends on what you believe and what you do.

Many happy, successful people have been raised by working moms. It is not the circumstance of life, but how we perceive those circumstances and what we do that has the greatest impact. It’s us who decide whether challenges will be stumbling blocks or stepping-stones to joy and success in life. We can offer hope and a basis for dealing with the struggles in ways that benefit rather than harm children.Give up the belief that you must make it up to your child for being a working mother. Be positive and focus on how you can make the best of your present opportunities as a working mom to help your children feel special. Following are seven possibilities.

 

  1. Take time for hugs. No matter how busy you are, there is always time for a three-second hug. That is a substantial hug that can lift spirits and change attitudes–yours and your child’s. Sometimes a hug can be the most effective method to stop misbehavior.
  2. Hold weekly family meetings. Twenty to thirty minutes a week is a small investment of time with huge payoffs. Children feel very special when they are listened to, taken seriously and have their thoughts and ideas validated.
  3. Ask for help. Children need to feel needed. Children feel special when they are helping. They don’t feel special when they are being scolded and put down
  4. Spend regularly scheduled, special time with your child. Try to say- “I’m too busy or too tired now, but I’m looking forward to our special time.”
  5. Share sad and happy times as part of the bedtime routine. You may be surprised at the things you hear when your children have a few minutes of your undivided attention to evaluate their day and hear about yours.
  6. Take a few seconds to write a note for your child’s lunch bag, pillow, or mirror.
  7. When you run a short errand in the car, ask one of your children to ride along — just so you can spend as much time as possible together.

Simply let them know how glad you are to have a few minutes to be with them, and share special moments from your own life or day. Kids feel special when you share yourself.

Helping your child feel special is a matter of planning and habit, not a lack of time. The fringe benefit of making it a habit to help your child feel special is that you will feel like a special mom or dad.


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